Pop Peeves

I’ve had a lot of heavy stuff on my mind lately. (And really, who hasn’t?) Coronavirus and the 2020 election cycle are just the tip of the iceberg. So I feel like talking about something stupid and pointless. I’m thinking pop music pet peeves. They are unimportant and inconsequential, a perfect distraction.

In no particular order:

1. whisper-singing (e.g., Mariah Carey)

2. that weird trill that’s not actually vibrato

3. the mumbling muttering that passes for rap now

4. vocal fry (e.g., Britney Spears; any male country singer)

5. nasal singing

6. Cardi B

7. “feat.”

Every other song on the radio is an artist “feat.” at least one other artist. This irrationally bugs me. Back in my day, artists collaborated, but they were credited differently. I’m no music historian, but the way I remember it, these were mostly duets.

Duets are straightforward. Dolly Parton and Kenny Rogers. Stevie Nicks and Don Henley. Philip Bailey and Phil Collins. Joe Cocker and Jennifer Warnes. Paul McCartney and Stevie Wonder. Diana Ross and Lionel Richie. Nobody is featuring anybody. Just “[Name One] and [Name Two].”

And then there are the songs where you think you recognize the vocals, but you have to figure it out for yourself. You would hear a song on the radio and think, “That sounds like…” and you wonder…but there’s no Google to look it up because it’s THE EIGHTIES.

“That sounds like Sting…”

“Is that…is that Michael McDonald?”

“Who is ‘Rockwell’ and why is Michael Jackson singing on his song?”

On the current Billboard chart, eight of the top forty songs are “feat.” somebody else. Why does that bother me? Absolutely no good reason.